Quote of the day:
“It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.”
– Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Often we find ourselves jammed in a corner, thinking to oneself, “Should I? Or should I not?” This has nevertheless occurred to me time and over again because of little conflicts and disagreements in the way I think compared to others. It’s hard to say that I fit well in society because of that particular trait. I don’t really spend time with anyone outside of my family circle, simply because they’re not exactly people to get intimate with, or rather, there is less productivity, in the way I define it, that results from such activities. Similarly, I’m not one to spend time outside much as well unless it’s beneficial. I really just don’t see the point of going to some place just to talk or as people normally say hang out. Come to think of it, the idea is time wasting, money wasting and ultimately, you can always do something better. While you might not even be doing something better, I definitely still disprove of it; why should one waste his or her time when there’s an opportunity of bringing up something useful? Unfortunately society believes otherwise; a lot prefer to spend time outside because it is indeed “useful”.

Social circles aside we then have my family. Sure enough I’ve inherited a lot of my dad’s traits. He and I both don’t like to enter malls much unless there’s some kind of purpose. In fact it doesn’t just apply to malls; it can quite literally be anywhere in the world. Yet a similar situation occurs again today. For what seems to be the third time in my life, I’ve been ditched by my family as they hit 1U for Chinese New Year clothes shopping. I’m not exactly dissatisfied with the idea of ditching me; I’ve never liked shopping much anyway, but the idea of leaving me alone seems quite painless to them. Worse to say this automatically means I’m not getting new clothes of my own; not that I don’t have enough clothes already. For this situation, yet again, I have the personal option of choosing to go or otherwise. Initially I considered it, but three things came into play. First, my presence has no impact on them; second, my so-called “brother” made it sound as if me not being there is fine, or would be preferred; third, aside from clothes, do I really need anything else? I think I might as well confirm my answer here.

Hard to say if there’s ever a right time to point it out, but they’re really cold-hearted if the importance of parking space can level my presence. My brother is also another useless one. For the amount of support the rest of the family gives, and the pride that we throw off just to please him; nothing is ever reciprocated. One of the worst feelings you get is when you help someone out so much, and in return, his or her personal pride still stands in the way of what’s supposed to be right.

Times like these you might just wonder who’s really out there looking for you other than your parents. There’s still else to be said about these things, but if I can’t even rely on my family for something so little, what’s my position in the world in the future to come?